A Letter To The Boy I Love.

 
 
The world is an empty place, left to be lit by people that make you smile with each encounter, that drive you to the brink of insanity with each word, but leave you loving them more than anyone else, each and every time. 

You’ve done that to me.

You’ve taken me for a ride I’ll never recover from. I’ve travelled through a symphony of euphoria, and a cacophony of anguish, only to be left wondering what more to expect.

You’ve transformed me, and left me to myself. You’ve broken me, and never looked back. I blame myself for allowing you to infiltrate the walls that protect my heart, yet I blame you for capturing my soul and refusing to return it.

I’m road-rage, a manic disorder of epic proportions, and you accepted it. You saw the wonder in me, the beauty in the panic and the strength in my cries.

But I’ve changed since the day I met you. 

You have too, a mesmerising yet heartbreaking realisation that I wake up with everyday. I tell myself that you aren’t any different, but I know that you’ll never be the person you were before me.

And I’ll never be the same again. 

I know it’s not much.

But I’ll always love you.

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Conquer.

 
Each day, I tend to wind myself a silk web of lies and rest my eyes, as I am weary of this limitless pain. It is an uphill battle, that’s almost impossible to win. 

Yet, I race against time, and I will never accept defeat.

Time has never been my friend, but it’ll never be my enemy. I shall always conquer it, no matter how hard it tries to escape.

We must remember that our lives define us, and if we keep pushing, we will always succeed. 

Time is just an obstacle, it’ll never deter anyone from true success.

I strive for survival in this dog-eat-dog world. It is cruel and daunting, yet completely rewarding, in a twisted way. 

We all have our purpose in this world, and once we’ve fulfilled it, we are at peace. 

But until that day, we must struggle to make a better version of ourselves.

So at the end of each day, when you wish to change who you are, and you wrap yourself in a web of lies, do not hate yourself. 

It is this hatred that stops you. 

Conquer your fears, and become who you truly are.